REFLECTION

     Throughout this semester, one of the things I've done is read various kinds of books. From books like The Prophet with its wise teaching and biblical style of writing to A Woman Is no Man its descriptive and heart aching story. In my very first entry, I mentioned wanting to know more writers from different cultures, and this course has introduced me to talented writers like Suheir Hammad, Kahlil Gibran, and Etaf Rum whose work I will continue to read after this course is over. I am the type of person to stick to one type of writing style, so reading books from authors with such diverse writing style as well as the poems we look at really help me explore literature in a new light. 

    I also mention of expanding my knowledge on Arab American culture as well as their experience post 9/11. While reading my past blogs, I can see how much I've learned in regard to Arab Americans post 9/11. Moustafa Bayoumi's How Does it Feel to Be a Problem gave an insightful experience of how Arab Americans were treated through Rasha's story. Once in a promised land is a book that I chose for my presentation, and this book also gave me a really good insight into how life was like post 9/11. Reading about how the characters lost their friends and people who they once trust wholeheartedly turning their back of them was saddening and it showed me different ways in which the tragedy impacted their lives. There was many examples of the way Americans treated Arab Americans in the book, and the ignorance, xenophobia, and racism were shocking but important to learn of because it allowed me to understand how big of an issue it is.   9/11 is an event that everyone knows of, and I remember learning about it in school and other places, but how Arab Americans were impacted by this tragedy isn't something I personally ever been taught of. This course has given me the opportunity to learn and understand the extent of injustice that this group went through because I was only ever aware of the discrimination, but never fully understood what kinds of experience they had. 

   In a cultural aspect, I've learned a lot about Arab culture, and it is a culture that is so different from my own and it was a great experience to put myself in a whole new perspective and angle to learn more about Arab culture. One of the most memorable events from this class is trying the food that Dr. Esa bought for us just because it was really delicious :). Learning new words, and listening to music from a different culture was really interesting as well. 

   This course has been challenging because there is a lot of reading to be done, but the readings were interesting, which made the classwork easier. Although it was a bit hard to read so many books in a pretty short amount of time, looking back at the number of books that I've read during this semester is really accomplishing. Suheir Hammad is definitely an author that I've to recommend to my friends, and one of the most impactful authors that I was introduced to in this course. The movies and Films also made the course really fun and watching the film version of The Prophet was a really great experience. 

  Overall, I truly believe that I've expanded my knowledge on Arab American experience and culture as well as literature as a whole throughout this course, and I've found authors that I really like and will continue to read their works. 

A woman is no man

  The prologue opens with saying "I was born without a voice, one cold, overcast day in Brooklyn, New York. No one ever spoke of my condition. I did not know I was mute until years later when I opened my mouth to ask for what I wanted and realized no one could hear me". The opening itself foreshadows and tie the theme of this novel, which is of gender inequality and oppression of woman. However, this novel gives them a voice.
  Isra suffered most of her life, confined in the basement, the guilt of borning only daughters hanging over her head; she was trapped in depression and loneliness. In the novel, we see that she had some hope of leading a different life when preparing to come to America, a glimpse of hope that maybe women would have more rights, that she would be freer. Her mom had told her it doesn't matter if where she is in the world, a woman will always be a woman, and Isra learned that early on. The fact that Isra suffers the fate of death at the hands of her own husband is tragic. It would be nice to hear that she made it out, she escaped with her children and led a completely different life. However, her death at the hands of her husband is in a way realistic. Most women don't make it out of these situations because for many of them, it is all they know. Although devastating and brutal, this scene shines a light on the reality of domestic abuse and the life that these women had to endure. While reading books that Sarah had snuck in for her, Isra always expresses her desire to find women like her in the novel, and I believe that this novel grants her wish in a way.
  The ending of the book is tragic because readers know that Isra never made it to freedom while reading the scene of her taking a bus to escape. However, I believe that this scene shows the love she has for her children. Throughout the novel, we see Isra as a quiet girl, never daring to speak her mind, and the complete opposite of Sarah. She was depressed, and at some point, felt like there was nothing she could do except to endure the pain and have patience, forgetting about the aspect of love in a marriage. Her running to the bus with her children gives us a glimpse of hope, and prove that she IS brave, that she always had something in her to take the kids away and flee from her home. When reading about how she constantly had daughters, we can see that Isra is visibly upset. Her situation and shame she carries from having daughters made her resent the girls at some times. Deya sometimes questions if her mother ever loved her. This ending also shows that Isra has so much love for her daughters because she risked everything to take them away so they could lead a better life.
    A woman telling her story is important socially, culturally, and individually because these are words that the world need to hear. Books like this give the voiceless a voice and call for a change in the way that women are treated. Character such as Freeda is a prime example of the consequence of being raised within a mindset where women are seen as less than. Freeda knows that women are treated wrong and that Isra was being hit, however; she does nothing about it because this is all normal to her. She has a mindset that this is how it is for women and that they should just deal with it.  Of course, this toxic mindset of hers became toxic and contribute to Isra's fate. However, telling a story of different generations with different women dealing with inequality gives the world an insight of their reality.

Hisham Matar

 The presentation that was most interesting for me was Ta'Niya's presentation on Hisham Matar because the plot of the book caught my attention. The interplay between innocence and corruption is interesting because like the presentation mentions,  children are often unaware of the problems that occur in life but the 9 years old boy in this book had to be exposed to the ugliness of the world early.
  There are also quite a lot of political and historical elements mentioned in the book such as exile and oppression, however; we can look at it different perspectives and viewpoints, and I think that kind of flexibility is intriguing. As mentioned, the book goes into themes such as adolescence, betrayal, family, and loyalty. The character seems to experience many hardships and hurdles throughout his life. Looking at Hisham's background, it can be seen that he shares some similarities with the character in his book. His father was kidnapped and sent to a facility where torture and poor treatment is prominent, and incorporating his life experiences in his book sets a realistic factor. This book explores various relationships, between friends, neighbors, and mostly, parent to children, and how each relationship can have an impact on an individual.
   Suleiman, who is the protagonist, catches my attention because he is a young boy who is trying to make sense of the world around him, and what it means to be in the adult world. In a way, it also reflects into my own childhood of trying to understand the world at such a young age, being exposed to hardships. His mother, when drunk, often reveals to him things that she would never mention if she was sober, like getting married at 14 and losing her childhood. Suleiman's mother also experiences the struggle with losing her innocence and being thrown into the adult world at an early age, trying to make sense of being a wife. This part was interesting to me because of the realization that there are people who do get married at a young age, and that it is a reality that they live, not just a story from a book.
  This book also interests me the most because there are a lot of discussion topics that could be drawn.  For example, one could discuss the idea of freedom and punishment, and the affect that exile and imprisonment can have by observing the characters. Suleiman grew up lacking a mother or father figure, and there could be various discussions on how this impacts his life. Gender and identity issues are also mentioned, and how fear due to political issues shapes the character into who they are.
  Although it is fictional, you can tie real-life accounts of many of the issues that are mentioned in the book. Hisham's father was exiled, and it is also one of the themes in the book, and it leads to further thinking of real-life accounts of exile.

A Map of Home

    A Map Of Home is a coming of age story in which Nidali heads towards adulthood, and learn the beauty yet ugly truth about the world. From the start of the novel, Nidali already learns that the world isn't perfect and all rainbow from the reveal of the non-cliche, picture-perfect way in which her parents met each other. As we follow her journey, we learn very quickly that Nidali experiences the ugly parts of the world at a young age. In Kuwait, a war causes her family to flee to Egypt, and Nidali is forced to deal with the struggles of life. Along with dealing with the turmoil of war, and constantly having to move homes; Nidali experiences struggles with her identity. Born to a Palestinian father, and an Egyptian mother, Nidali battles unfamiliar backgrounds, along with trying to reason with her strict father's expectations.
    In her new neighborhood, she meets a boy by the name of Fakhr, and she begins her first romantic relationship. We can see that Nidali is growing up, and starting to leave her innocence as she explores romantic relationships. During this time, she experiments with her sexuality, and masturbation, followed by feelings of guilt. Nidali is learning more about herself and becoming conscious of the world around her. In Egypt, she is aware of the stricter rule in society concerning public display of affection and such as she warns Fakhr to not kiss her in public again during their reunion. Nidali also moves a lot throughout the novel, having to adapt to new environments and leaving behind the people she already built special bonds with. This is in a way, also a part of lessons about life that she learns throughout her life, that some people are temporary.
   As Nidali's family pack their bags and move again, we follow Nidali to her reaching adulthood and figuring out what it is she wants to do with her life.  In America, Nidali is yet faced again with struggles, this time, having to adapt from an eastern to western life. Texas public high school allowed her to experience being a teenager as she develops a crush on a boy named Omar, and mingle with new friend group. During this period of her life, tensions with her father increase, and she tries to break from her father trying to control her life. She learns of how different her peers live compare to herself, expressing her anger to her parents that she wants to have more freedom. We also see her running away from home for the first time, showing teenage rebellion against her strict home life, as she tries to negotiate with her parents to give her more freedom. She learns that she wants to become a writer, and had a hard time convincing her parents, especially her father, to allow her to attend Boston University. In the end, we finally see Nidali going off to college, and in a foreshadowing scene of her catching a pen, pursuing her dreams to become a writer.

   A Map Of Home tells the story of Nidali, a girl who grew up in a tough situation due to political changes and having to adapt to new environments. It is certainly a coming of age story where a girl remains optimistic through various struggles in her life, leading up to her adulthood.
 

THE INHERITANCE OF EXILE

    Preparing a Face is a chapter that left a long-lasting impression on me even after finishing the book, and grabs my full attention. I chose this story because it is a story that speaks to me. 

  

  Hanan's character is someone that I can personally relate to although we are from very different cultures and backgrounds; we have one thing in common, and that is the sole fact that we both struggle to fit into the ideal woman that our rather strict community expect of us. At the beginning of the story, Hanan serves the guest in the wrong order, she was supposed to serve the oldest person first, and work her way to the youngest. This was a great insult to her uncle, who was the oldest guest, as her mother said. Hanan struggles to understand why this was a big deal. This scene gave me memories of times I've done things that are small mistakes to me but a huge embarrassment for my parents. I relate to Hanan in a way that she has difficulties remembering to do or not do certain things that are important in her culture. Hanan's character is a bit rebellious and reckless, and it was shown through her driving with her mom, and getting stopped by the police or going to clubs that her mom disapproves of. It is quite humorous reading these parts of the story, remembering my mom's disappointment when I first dyed my hair purple, blue, pink, red, then green. I see parts of myself in Hanan, which makes the story seem personal and also interesting. 

   

    Hanan and her mom have a rocky relationship because of the different ways that they were raised, and it is hard for both of them to understand each other. Like Hanan's mom, my own mother also experiences awful hardships back in her homeland, and she is also a very traditional woman. In one instance, Hanan asks her mom what is the problem with girls dancing, and her mom shot back at her by saying "we were too busy fleeing from the soldiers to go dancing"; Her mom's teenage years are far too different from Hanan, and it creates a barrier because it is hard for both of them to fully understand one another. My mom and I were raised in a completely different environment, and we both have different perspectives, beliefs, and views on many things in life, which is why this story speaks to me in a way that I can see my life through Hanan to a certain extent. 

   Hanan is also constantly getting compared to her perfect cousin Rola, who seems to be the ideal daughter that her mom wants for Hanan. Its as if there is always that one perfect cousin that we all get compared to, and it was pretty funny seeing Hanan's reactions to Rola because I can see myself doing the same thing. When they went to the club, Hanan learns more about Rola, and how she came to the US to escape the strict life she was living and the fact that she wanted an abortion. In a way, it shows that the people we always get compared to have stories of their own. I have many friends who are the perfect and ideal girl that my community praises them to be, but they also struggle with living up to that expectation and sometimes crave a bit of freedom. 

  This story and the characters made me view people in my life in a different light, realizing that thee are hidden stories and struggles in everyone's life that we may not understand. 

Crescent - Diana Abu-Jaber

Food is something that is constantly found in the novel, Crescent. Sirine is a chef who works in a restaurant in LA, where she met Han. With each interaction, Sirine and Han fall deeper in love with one another. Sirine has a knack of using food as a metaphor to describe situations. In a way, food became its own language, to describe love, pain, and so much more. 
   When she describes intimate moments with Han, she compares it to food. She compares it to the sweetness and the way certain food tastes. In moments where Sirine feels like she is on top of the world with Han, having him by her side, and laying in his arm, the food she describes is full of flavors. Sirine connects everything dear to her to food because it is where she finds comfort. During the most important time with Han, she brings up food, which allows readers to understand how valuable he is to her, and her love for him.
  As the story progresses, we can see that Sirine starts to describe food in a negative way; sweet and flavorful good becomes bland and unappetizing, Through the reflection of food, we can also see Sirine's feelings and mental health. After Han left and disappeared, nothing tasted the same; it is almost as if the way she saw the world shited into a gloomy perspective.
 Looking back at when Han and Sirine made Baklava, it is a beautiful and meaningful scene. Sirine had expressed that it is somewhat difficult to make. The two of them shared their first special moment through food, there was a nostalgic feeling surrounding them; Sirine remembers what life was like then, and Han recalls memories of his family.
   Most of the scenes also took place in the kitchen, where Sirine works, and it is almost like her second home. She met Han in a restaurant and found out he is still alive in the same place. Sirine is someone who is somewhat going through an identity crisis, because she lost her parents at a young age, and lost the opportunity to be in touch with her culture. Food, in a way, becomes one way she can feel connected to her Arabic side. For Sirine, Food is a love language.

Arab Americans after 9/11

The last several years have taken their toll. I ask him about life after September 11 for Arab Americans. “We're the new blacks,” he says. “You know that, right?”

The book title alone shows the extent of injustices Arab Americans had to endure after the 9/11 incident. "How Does it Feel To Be a Problem?", a problem, generalizing all Arab Americans and putting them in one category. After 9/11, they felt as if they should apologize for something that they did not even do, something far beyond their faults. The government forcefully arrested them, and profiling became a common theme. In the preface of the novel, Said founds out a close friend was a detective all along. I tried to imagine what it would feel like, to realize that people suspect you of wrongdoings based on your ethnicity and background alone, to have your trusts broken when even people you thought were like family become one of the suspecting eyes. Even if I put myself in their shoes, I could never truly understand the hardship and turmoil that came after 9/11.

Bayoumi shares Rasha's story of getting taken to a facility forcefully, without being told of why they're going there. This is an experience that many Arab Americans had to go through after 9/11. The justice system showed no mercy to anyone, not even young children like Rasha and her siblings. One of her sisters had a painful rash but was completely ignored by the officers guarding the room, and it is only a small example of awful events that took place in the facility.

I've always heard around how often people with Arab backgrounds go through extra security checks, but never really understood the severity of the issues until now. Like Rasha's family who was captured on what it seemed to be a normal day, many people faced the same fate, however; a lot of them were deported. It is disheartening to realize that Rasha's family was one of the "lucky" ones because what they had to endure was unfair and wrong.